Family Conflict And Triangulation Analysis

Family Conflict And Triangulation Analysis The purpose of this article is to illustrate the importance of boundary setting during parental conflict. Often children are incorporated both voluntarily and involuntarily in dyadic confrontations that involve the parents. This research shows the long term and short term effects on both the parent and child psychologically and physiologically. Boundary setting is important for the growth, development and current maintenance of a family. Involving children in arguments is not only detrimental to the parents marital relationship, but also damaging to the parent-child relationship. This paper illustrates cause and effect consequences of triangulation. Family Conflict and Triangulation Familial conflict is inevitable. A multitude of quantitative and qualitative data has been accumulated in order to improve familial relationships. Numerous studies and focus groups spotlighted adolescents and their parents to find more data on triangulation and its negative effects on families. According to Franck and Buehler (2007), a triangulation study was conducted on 506 teens and their mothers. The study focused on conflict properties, cognitive appraisals of threat and blame, emotional insecurity, and triangulation to determine the possibility of a direct relationship between adolescent behavior problems, marital distress, and maternal depression (Franck and Buehler 2007). After thorough research, it was found that marital hostility and distress were associated with adolescent behavioral problems and familial stressors (Franck Buehler 2007). This paper will focus on parental and child triangulation and its effect on both the adolescent and the adult. Triangulation can be defined in a multitude of ways. Some may use the term mathematically, while others use it psychologically. Fosco and Grych (2008) broadly described the psychological term for triangulation as the involvement of a third person in a dyadic conflict. Triangulation is not possible with two people; it has to involve at least three people triangulate the conversation and ensure one or more of the parties agrees with his or her opinion. Buehler and Welsh (2009) stated that triangulation occurs when two people in a family bring a third party to dissolve stress, anxiety or tension that exists between them. Often feuding parents might involve their children in the conflict to gang up on the other parent. A more in-depth definition that better describes the target group focused on in this paper illustrates a family and child triangulation as childrens direct participation in parental disagreements and their subjective sense of feeling caught in the middle (Fosco and Grych, 2008). Due to ignorance, some parents may be unaware that they are involved in triangulation. Some statements a child might say if he or she is involved in a triangulation situation are My parents make me feel caught in the middle when they argue my mom always asks if I notice how my dad starts the fights mom and dad always ask me questions when they are in the middle of an argument after an argument with mom, dad always comes to me and explains his point of view I hate it when mom and dad involve and ask me questions when they are arguing. Parents should be more cognizant of accidentally or purposely involving children in marital disputes because it can be detrimental to the child. Efforts to better understand the impact of interparental disagreements on children have identified a number of factors that may elude to the fact that exposure to continual hostile and poorly resolved conflict can cause adjustment problems. (Fosco and Grych 2008). Behavior issues may become more frequent when boundaries are not set between parental arguments and children. According to Fosco and Grych (2008), appraisals reflect childrens opinions on parental conflict. Parental conflict can be detrimental to the childs well-being or the functioning of the family unit; therefore, the child may hold himself or herself responsible and believe that the disagreement was caused by his or her conduct. Parents who involve children in marital confrontations fail to realize how detrimental involvement can be to their child. Specifically, appraisals of threat and self-blame, emotional reactivity and distress, and triangulation into parental discrepancies each have been made known to play a key ro le in the relationship involving parental discord and child maladjustment, thereby making the child feel responsible for ending or resolving the conflict. (Fosco and Grych 2008). The effects of parental triangulation on the child can cause long term damage. According to Buehler and Welsh (2009) Parental conflict and tension are proposed to induce emotional arousal in children, triggering emotional and physiological responses. Involving children in arguments can be both mentally and physically exhausting for the child. Families that show patterns of triangulation have emotional, and physiological, responses that tend to have difficulty differentiating when not to turn off than in families with better boundary maintenance (Buehler and Welsh 2009). Often parents will include the child in arguments forcing the child to choose a side. Franck and Buehler focused on triangulation that occurs when parents bring a child into an argument by using the child as a messenger or buffer between the parents; as a confidante or counselor about issues with the other parent, the child is forced to ally against the other parent during marital disputes. By allowing children to get involved in domestic disputes, not only is the child negatively affected, but the involvement is also detrimental to the marriage. Triangulation amplifies adolescences risk for disruptive behavior because this process impedes with numerous prospective strategies that have been found to shield youths from the potential harmful effects of marital hostility (Franck and Buehler 2007). Research shows that repeated exposure to parental conflict can affect a childs experience, expression and control of emotion (Fosco and Grych 2008). Children subjected to constant triangulation can experience major emotional tribulations as well. It was found through trauma theories that recurring exposure to affectively disturbing events undermines a childs ability to regulate his or her emotions (Fosco and Grych 2008). When a child is unable to regulate his or her emotions it becomes difficult for them to maintain control. With this information, it can be concluded that a child from an argumentative family may display a greater sensitivity to his or her parents conflicts (Fosco and Grych 2008). Children who are exposed to tumultuous relationships and constant triangulation by parents are not as thoroughly researched as other topics that have been researched that involve family conflict. Beuhler and Welsh (2009) stated Triangulation into parents disputes has received much less empirical attention than has verbal and physical interparental aggression; however, some evidence exists that triangulation places youth at risk for adjustment problems, particularly internalizing problems such as anxiety, depressive symptoms, and social withdrawal (2009). Triangulation does not just occur during an argument between parents with a child present. It also occurs long term when a child is made a confidante. Franck and Buehler (2007) found that when parents get upset they have a tendency to bring children into the argument by making them messengers between the parents. Triangulation can be caused by a number of different reasons. Martial conflict and depression have been named to be some of the main reasons triangulation occurs. Parents involved in domestic disputes have a tendency to want a witness to validate their argument. Counselors, friends, family members, and children have been known to get pulled in to the dispute. Scholars found data proving that parents that involve people in their domestic disputes may be depressed (Frank and Beuhler 2007). Parents feel validated when loved ones and friends side with them in the domestic dispute. Frank and Beuhler (2007), searched even deeper and found that a mothers depression is more closely related to internalizing disruptive behaviors in children than fathers. Frank and Beuhler (2007) felt that a fathers depression is more closely related to poor cognitive functioning in his children than internalizing problem behaviors. Studies show that triangulation affects both the parent and the childs relationships in a negative way. One of the mechanisms by which marital conflict becomes a risk factor is the triangulation of the child or adolescent into parental disputes such that youth feel caught in the middle and torn between divided loyalties (Buehler and Welsh 2009). During an argument, parents feel that their point is more validated if the child agrees with them. Unfortunately, the long term affects of adolescent affirmation during parental altercations are detrimental to the marital relationship. Although their involvement in a parental disagreement may be effective in deflecting attention from problems in the marriage, it may intensify the impact of parental conflict on childrens functioning by making them the target of parental anger or disrupting their relationship with one or both parents (Fosco and Grych 2008). Studies show that it is pertinent that the children be left out of parental conflict. It is clear that triangulation of adolescents also is harmful to adolescents in married families. Thus, clinicians and others who work with families need to assist parents with keeping marital problems within the martial dyad. Adolescent children need to be left out or blocked from parents marital issues; Parents need to improve their ability to cope with and handle the anxiety associated with martial conflict in ways that do not involve their children (Buehler and Welsh 2009). In addition to disrupting marital stability, triangulation can cause long term issues in the growth and development of the family. Fosco and Grych (2008) stated that when children perceive conflict as a threat to themselves or the family, they tend to worry about the stability of the family relationship. Running a family requires order, with no stability, there is no foundation; and with no foundation it tends to be less order. Parents should lead by example when teaching children. Often children mimic their parents and learn from observations. Parents who frequently resort to triangulation as a means of managing their disputes may be less prone to teaching or modeling adaptive conflict resolution to their children (Fosco And Grych 2008). Avoiding the involvement of children can be very difficult for some parents. Not only does triangulation temporarily diffuse marital arguments, but it can also allude to the vindication or validation of a parents actions. Fosco and Grych (2008) found information proving that triangulation could shape the impact of parental discord in children. When the child feels caught in the middle and observes that the attention of the argument is deflected from the parents and reverted to them, they may make a habit of involving themselves and marital disputes. If disruptive behavior is effective at distracting attention from marital problems, children may develop more stable patterns of acting out in stressful circumstances. Triangulation can occur both consciously and subconsciously. Unfortunately, if in the familial setting boundaries are not in place, detrimental repercussions can occur. Triangulation can occur in many different forms. Whether it includes the parent and child, grandparent and grandchild or siblings and parent, an unconstructive outcome is almost inevitable. The need to want to be right and acquire support is human nature and understandable. However, when you engage children in tumultuous relationships and put them in the middle of altercations, serious repercussions may occur for the child and adult. Rather than involving relatives and friends in conflict, it is important that families seek out counseling to secure the growth and stability of the family structure. Therapists can utilize a number of different techniques and or approaches to help families partaking in triangulation. Due to the difference of upbringing, social, cultural, and economic levels, it is best that the counselor incorporate an integrative approach to families who are involved in a triangulation conflict. An integrative approach incorporates all of all the approaches. It allows the therapist to utilize the best fitting approach for the client to obtain optimal results. Conflict is inevitable and felt to be manifest, but if familial conflict involves triangulation it is sure to end unconstructively.

Book Review of “Cheaper” by the Dozen

The autobiographical book Cheaper by the Dozen was written in 1949. Since then, it has been reprinted numerous times, most recently in 2003. The book, written by Frank B. Gilbreth Jr. and Ernestine Gilbreth Carey, two of the twelve children of Frank and Lillian Gilbreth, is about Frank Jr. and Ernestine's recollections of growing up, in the company of ten other siblings and two high-powered engineers as parents, in a huge house in Montclair, New Jersey, around the turn of the 20th century. Much of the humor within this book is because the father of this huge family, Frank, is a good-hearted man who loves his twelve children and their antics, but is also an engineer (as is his wife Lillian) by profession, and an â€Å"efficiency expert†. Frank Sr. likes to believe problems and conflicts can be solved in a sort of mechanical way, and sometimes with just one quick solution for every problem (at least that is his theory). Many funny and ironic situations arise from this questionable premise. Still, as the authors of Cheaper by the Dozen recall, â€Å"Dad was happiest in a crowd, especially a crowd of kids† (p. ). But since, as an engineer, Frank Sr. owns a scientific management company, he continually tries to apply his various principles of â€Å"scientific management† at home, with mixed results. In one incident, he does so by taking motion pictures of his children washing dishes and doing other household chores, which he calls â€Å"motion study† (p. 3) in order to study their efficiency at these tasks (or the lack thereof), and then hopefully apply what he has learned from these homemade â€Å"motion studies† to other workplace situations. Frank Sr. lso has each of his twelve children chart their weights and other progress each day, on a â€Å"progress and weight chart† (p. 3) he has put up on the bathroom wall, as soon as they can physically write (which is early, since the father has high expectations of his children in every respect). There is sometimes disagreement between Frank Sr. and the children's mother, Lillian, which points out some of the differences between them. For example, Lillian wants to save a spot on the â€Å"progress and weight charts† for recording the children's daily prayers, but Frank Sr. ever the practical man of action rather than contemplation, insists there is no room for that. Many of the funniest episodes in the book derive from these types of conflicts (always rather gentle ones) between the parents, especially since their mother, Lillian, is more relaxed in terms of her personality, and sees everything more individually and perhaps, at times, more clearly as well (although Lillian never directly insists on this to Frank Sr. , but just lets things happen until the truth becomes apparent on its own). Although both Lillian and Frank Sr. re brilliant engineers, Lillian seems to have more personal insight into her children as individuals. And, despite Frank Sr. ‘s considerable â€Å"efficiency†, Lillian often has more common sense. This is perhaps reflected in the way Frank Sr. and his philosophies of â€Å"efficiency† are joked about, much more in the book, than Lillian or her actions or beliefs are joked about. Lillian was an early career woman, and one of the other themes of this book is how she handled, so well, especially for those times, a high-powered career and raising twelve children. Lillian Gilbreth herself, although not the main focus of this book, is very inspiring in that way. The main reason, overall, that I liked this book is because the humor within it is good natured, and the high-powered Gilbreth family, even though it is so large and chaotic, and has its own share of challenges and setbacks, is not â€Å"dysfunctional† in any way, like so many, even smaller, families today. That, in and of itself, is amazing. Whatever is happening, inside or outside the family, there is always love, solidarity, and teamwork within the family itself. The authors also mention how Frank Sr. would never criticize his family to anyone outside the family. Obviously, this book was set in far simpler times than today. For example, as the now grown up Gilbreth siblings first describe their father: â€Å"Dad was a tall man, with a large head, jowls, and a Herbert Hoover collar†¦ † (p. 1). This tells us right away that the book takes place many decades ago, since Herbert Hoover was President in the 1920's. Even the conflicts and disagreements detailed within the book, which are always described truthfully and in detail, seem humorous, good-natured, and reasonable, especially compared to many kinds of family conflicts today. Also, these conflicts are always agreeably resolved, without any lasting damage to any of the children or their egos. This, also, is truly amazing, since both parents are so busy, not only inside but outside the home. Also, the mother and the father are very different from one another by nature, but as the authors point out, they work well together and do everything well as a team. They are always supportive of each other and their children. Dr. Lillian Gilbreth seems the true hero of the Cheaper by the Dozen family. Frank Gilbreth Sr. died before any of his children had reached 20 years old. Lillian continued raising the children on her own, while working and lecturing full-time. Moreover, she managed to put them all through college. Lillian Gilbreth, amazingly, given both the time and the large number of children she had, also had a very distinguished career in her own right when few women had such careers, and even fewer were also mothers of such large families. Still, Lillian Gilbreth managed to be a loving and attentive mother to all of her children. I found Cheaper by the Dozen to be a very inspiring book, and always very honest and humorous. Cheaper by the Dozen conveys the message that family members who love one another, stick together, and have a sense of humor about things that happen in families, and in life, can make it through anything. Therefore, I highly recommend the book Cheaper by the Dozen as an excellent reading experience for everyone.

The History of Pepsi Cola

Pepsi Cola is one of the most recognizable products in the world today, almost as famous for its commercials as for its never-ending battle with rival soft drink Coca-Cola. From its humble origins more than 125 years ago in a North Carolina pharmacy, Pepsi has grown into a product available in multiple formulations. Find out how this simple soda became a player in the Cold War and became a pop stars best friend. Humble Origins The original formula for what would become Pepsi Cola was invented in 1893 by pharmacist Caleb Bradham of New Bern, N.C. Like many pharmacists at the time, he operated a soda fountain in his drugstore, where he served drinks that he created himself. His most popular beverage was something he called Brads drink, a mix of sugar, water, caramel, lemon oil, kola nuts, nutmeg, and other additives. As the beverage caught on, Bradham decided to give it a snappier name, eventually settling on Pepsi-Cola. By the summer of 1903, he had trademarked the name and was selling his soda syrup to pharmacies and other vendors throughout North Carolina. By the end of 1910, franchisers were selling Pepsi in 24 states.   At first, Pepsi had been marketed as a digestive aid, appealing to consumers with the slogan, Exhilarating, Invigorating, Aids Digestion. But as the brand flourished, the company switched tactics and decided instead to use the power of celebrity to sell Pepsi. In 1913, Pepsi hired Barney Oldfield, a famous racecar driver of the era, as a spokesman. He became famous for his slogan Drink  Pepsi-Cola.  It Will Satisfy You. The company would continue to use celebrities to appeal to buyers in the coming decades. Bankruptcy and Revival After years of success, Caleb Bradham lost Pepsi Cola. He had gambled on the fluctuations of sugar prices during World War I, believing that sugar prices would continue to rise — but they fell instead, leaving Caleb Bradham with an overpriced sugar inventory. Pepsi Cola went bankrupt in 1923. In 1931, after passing through the hands of several investors, Pepsi Cola was bought by the Loft Candy Co. Charles G. Guth, Lofts president, struggled to make a success of Pepsi during the depths of the Great Depression. At one point, Loft even offered to sell Pepsi to executives at Coke, who refused to offer a bid. Guth reformulated Pepsi and began selling the soda in 12-ounce bottles for just 5 cents, which was twice as much as what Coke offered in its 6-ounce bottles. Touting Pepsi as twice as much for a nickel, Pepsi scored an unexpected hit as its Nickel Nickel radio jingle became the first to be broadcast coast to coast. Eventually, it would be recorded in 55 languages and named one of the most effective ads of the 20th century by Advertising Age. Pepsi Postwar   Pepsi made sure it had a reliable supply of sugar during World War II, and the drink became a familiar sight to U.S. troops fighting all across the globe. In the years after the war, the brand would remain long after American GIs had gone home. Back in the States, Pepsi embraced the postwar years. Company president Al Steele married actress Joan Crawford, and she frequently touted Pepsi during corporate gatherings and visits to local bottlers throughout the 1950s. By the early 1960s, companies like Pepsi had set their sights on the Baby Boomers. The first ads appealing to young people called the Pepsi Generation arrived, followed in 1964 by the companys first diet soda, also targeted at young people.   The company was changing in different ways. Pepsi acquired the Mountain Dew brand in 1964 and a year later merged with snack-maker Frito-Lay. The Pepsi brand was growing up quickly. By the 1970s, this once failing brand was threatening to displace Coca-Cola as the top soda brand in the U.S.  Pepsi even made international headlines in 1974 when it became the first U.S. product to be produced and sold within the U.S.S.R. A New Generation Throughout the late 1970s and early 80s, Pepsi Generation ads continued to appeal to young drinkers while also targeting older consumers with a series of Pepsi Challenge commercials and in-store tastings. Pepsi broke new ground in 1984 when it hired Michael Jackson, who was in the midst of his Thriller success, to be its spokesman. The TV commercials, rivaling Jacksons elaborate music videos, were such a hit that Pepsi would hire a number of well-known musicians, celebrities, and others throughout the decade, including Tina Turner, Joe Montana, Michael J. Fox, and Geraldine Ferraro.   Pepsis efforts were successful enough that in 1985 Coke announced that it was changing its signature formula. New Coke was such a disaster that the company had to backtrack and reintroduce its classic formula, something Pepsi frequently took credit for. But in 1992, Pepsi would suffer a product failure of its own when the spin-off Crystal Pepsi failed to impress Generation X buyers. It soon was discontinued. Pepsi Today Like its rivals, the Pepsi brand has diversified far beyond what Caleb Bradham could ever have imagined. In addition to the classic Pepsi Cola, consumers can also find Diet Pepsi, plus varieties without caffeine, without corn syrup, flavored with cherry or vanilla, even an 1893 brand that celebrates its original heritage. The company has also branched out into the lucrative sports drink market with the Gatorade brand, as well as Aquafina bottled water, Amp energy drinks, and Starbucks coffee beverages. Sources Calderone, Anna. Crystal Pepsi Will Return to Shelves One Last Time This Summer. People.com. 19 July 2017.CBS News staff. Almanac: Pepsi Cola. CBSNews.com. 16 June 2013.Herrera, Monica. Michael Jackson, Pepsi Made Marketing History. Billboard.com. 7 March 2009.PepsiCo staff writers. The Pepsi Cola Story. Pepsi.com. 2005.

Character Analysis of Harry Potter And The Sorcerers Stone - Free Essay Example

Sample details Pages: 4 Words: 1293 Downloads: 10 Date added: 2019/04/26 Category Literature Essay Level High school Tags: Harry Potter Essay Did you like this example? In the book, Harry Potter and the Sorcerers Stone, the character that stood out the most was Harry Potter. However, Neville felt like a good choice because he isnt talked about a lot in the book; yet is still important. Throughout chapters 7-9, you could tell that Neville has a fixed mindset; he shows it off pretty well. Don’t waste time! Our writers will create an original "Character Analysis of Harry Potter And The Sorcerers Stone" essay for you Create order In the book, Mindset, by Carol S. Dweck said that a fixed mindset is the belief that our traits are fixed or unchangeable, you want to prove yourself over and over (Dweck 6). A fixed mindset is someone who doesnt like facing challenges and will get butthurt if that person fails at something and someone who doesnt quite believe in themselves. That shows that Neville, in fact has a fixed mindset. However, Neville comes a long way throughout the book, for the majority of it, he definitely has a fixed mindset; but towards the end he starts to develop a little bit of a growth mindset. From reading Harry Potter, I can tell that Neville has a fixed mindset because he wasnt motivated and didnt have people who believed in him, clumsy and not a fan of challenges, and he felt like he couldnt fix his traits. Being accepted into Hogwarts you need to be a wizard, but for Neville he wasnt quite motivated enough and from that I dont believe that is all his fault. Neville Longbottom is a boy who was raised by his grandma, who is a witch. By having a relative who is magical, I would think that Nevilles grandma would motivate and support him. However, instead she did the opposite along with his other family members. In chapter seven, when Neville was talking about his family he said, they thought I might not be magical enough to come(Harry Potter, 125). That tells you that his grandma, aunt, and uncle didnt believe in him. They thought that he couldnt make it into Hogwarts. From Nevilles families attitudes, they reflect on Neville, making him have a fixed mindset. Longbottom also stated in chapter seven that they were all so happy they cried. That shows that Nevilles family were so surprised and shocked that they cried. Neville said, And you should have seen their faces when I got in here (Harr y Potter, 125). His grandmas and aunts and uncles faces were in shock because they didnt think that Neville had a chance in getting accepted into Hogwarts. From his family not believing, I could imagine Neville not believing in himself. Therefore, getting accepted into Hogwarts he must be feeling like he needs to do great to make his grandma proud. With doing so that is going to make challenging for him. People with a fixed mindset do not take challenges very well and with Neville being clumsy doesnt help. When coming to Hogwarts all the newcomers needed to be split up into four different houses which include; Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. As they arrive that is the first thing they do, they split up. The students line up and have to wait until their name is called. How this process works is once their name is called they sit on a stool and a hat is placed on their heads, the magic hat decides what house they will be placed in. When Nevilles name was called, he walked up to the stool and as he was walking to the he tripped, being his clumsy self. At first, I thought he wouldve been placed in Hufflepuff where all the other students are with a fixed mindset. Neville was assigned to live in Gryffindor alone with Harry, Ron, and Hermione. Where dwell the brave at heart, their daring, nerve (Harry Potter, 118), Neville being brave enough to attend Hogwarts he was also placed in the right home. Being placed into Gryffindor might help Neville expand his horizons and devel op a growth mindset alone with the other students in Gryffindor. Throughout the book he becomes involved in some challenges. It may be because of the other students or his lessons, he doesnt seem to be handling it very well. The time Neville was in Snapes class and didnt do the experiment correctly, Neville managed to melt Seamus cauldron into a twisted blob (Harry Potter, 139). He felt as if this was going to be a challenge, but did it anyways and failed. Neville ended up having to go to the hospital wing because he did something he really couldnt do and the outcome was him getting boils all over his nose. Neville is showing that he has a fixed mindset by not being able to do that potion the right way, by being clumsy. He couldve avoided this mess if he challenged himself by taking it slow and doing it correctly the first time. Neville did this maybe because he feels as if he cant fix his traits and become a true wizard. Neville not being able to fix his traits kind of ties back to his challenges that he has been facing. If he wont challenge himself then he wont try and fix his traits. For example, when they had flying lessons, Neville was scared to fly on the broom, Neville had never been on a broomstick in his life (Harry Potter, 144), his grandma wouldnt let him near a broomstick because she knew he wouldnt get into Hogwarts so whats the point? While trying to fly on the broom, he couldnt get his broomstick up to his hand, he tried the spell to get the broomstick from the ground to their hands but it didnt work. Even though he wanted to stay on the ground, he was even more nervous to stay on the ground because he didnt want to be the only person on the ground. Therefore, Neville pushed off the ground and went straight up, Harry saw his scared white face look down at the ground falling away (Harry Potter, 147). In that moment that shows that Neville is starting to develop a growth mindset. Even t hough it didnt go as planned, Neville didnt give up, he tried flying on the broomstick. With that being said, Neville doesnt want to accept the challenge by flying so he never attempted to fly on a broom again. Neville ends up breaking his wrist, that is another example of how clumsy he is. Therefore, by not fixing his traits means he gives up after trying something that is challenging to him, like flying and also in Snapes class. Instead, he will try one thing and if its too hard then he will give up and not try again. Being like Neville and not wanting to improve should help you better understand that he has a fixed mindset. Throughout Harry Potter, Neville had developed a fixed mindset. There were many ways to tell that he had one, also. For example, if it was by his living situation or just by him being at Hogwarts, its pretty easy to point out. Even though he wasnt brought up in the book a lot like Harry Potter, there are still many different ways to find out that he has a fixed mindset that overpowers Neville having a growth mindset in the book. Neville did quite a bit of trying something and then not doing it again because it was too challenging for him, and thats one of the few characteristics of having a fixed mindset. Neville is still important because hes one of the few characters in the book with a fixed mindset From reading Harry Potter, I can tell that Neville has a fixed mindset because he wasnt motivated and didnt have people who believed in him, clumsy and not a fan of challenges, and he felt like he couldnt fix his traits.